I NEVER had Prince William down as much of a cricket fan, so it was very nice of him to give England a patriotic pre-Ashes boost by getting engaged this week.

Presumably, this happy news inspired Ian Bell to crash 192 and Chris Tremlett, a man who makes Jackie Chan look injury-free, to avoid a limb falling off against Australia ‘A’, although it seems nothing less than the arrival of Royal triplets will get Kevin Pietersen back in the runs.

However, it’ll take more than Wills’ nuptials for Andrew Strauss’ men to triumph in Australia, cricket’s killing field of hope.

There was a reasonable amount of hope last time England headed there. Then the first ball left Steve Harmison’s hand in Brisbane, landed in the outskirts of Chesterfield and the game was up. But for the first time in a generation, an Ashes contest Down Under should be worth staying up for. And eight things I think will emerge from it are:


1. Graeme Swann feels the heat
If Swann comes through this series intact, he can genuinely call himself world-class. Even for somebody with more bounce than a spacehopper, that’ll be tough.

Australia will go after him in an attempt to destroy England’s four-bowler strategy, and even the top table of off-spinners have struggled on this soil.

With a massive workload to shoulder, he may struggle.


2. Kevin Pietersen plays his last series
Pietersen wears the look of somebody for whom cricket has become a job.

His once-thrilling batting is now confused, as if he’s trying to recapture the batsman he was while knowing it can’t be done. And if anybody was ever primed as a cricketing gun-for-hire, it’s Pietersen.

Retain the Ashes and he can go out on a high. If England lose and he fails, he could jump before he’s pushed. Either way, you might want to make the most of him over the next few weeks.


3. Eoin Morgan and Ajmal Shahzad make their mark
For all England’s settled-side bravado, many of its members are only one or two poor games away from being ditched.

Morgan and Shahzad have the not-fazed attitude to make them Ashes wildcards. And as half of England’s Ashes tour party usually end up on Lucozade and grapes, they’ll probably be needed anyway.


4. Stuart Broad shines
If England are to keep the Ashes, Broad needs a big series. Still partly operating on the promise of things to come, he faces a massive challenge with ball and bat.

He has the ability, the ego and the aggression, but does he have the guile, the craft and the temperament? This tour could elevate him to superstar status. I think he’ll deliver.


5. Mitchell Johnson has another shocker
Johnson strikes me as the Robbie Keane of cricket: everybody says they’d like him in their side but can’t explain why.

His pace and fire are negated by his all-right-on-the-night approach to accuracy and a fragile mindset which England can, and should, exploit, because Ben Hilfenhaus and Peter Siddle are better bowlers. He might be able to keep his mum out of it this time, though.


6. Mike Hussey survives, Marcus North doesn’t
Both are rabbits in the selectors’ headlights. One miserable match and tyre-tracks will be everywhere.

But while Hussey is a genuine class act with one more hand left to play, North is walking evidence that, during their cricketing monopoly, Australia forgot that even great players eventually retire.


7. Shane Watson and Jonathan Trott don’t get on
This pair are made for each other. Watson could start a row on a solo expedition to the middle of the Gobi desert, while Trott, who looks a bit useful, is a cert to wind up the Aussies with his knack of taking an average of 43 minutes between deliveries.

Bound to be more entertaining than Haye v Harrison, and not even on pay-per-view.


8. Australia win 2-1
With neither side having the potency to consistently take 20 wickets, it comes down to weight of runs, and that’s where Australia have the edge.

Too many of England’s top six are fumbling for form and it’s hard to see them making the intimidating scores which could crack the hosts and open the door for the sort of inspired, game-changing spell England often rely on.

However, I said 2-1 to Australia last time out, and...

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