TOP of the world down under – for now anyway. England’s glorious triumph at Adelaide over the Australians cheered us up no end in Blighty.

Beating the Aussies is always a beaut, even at anything – tiddly-winks, shopping, queueing, shovelling snow – but at cricket, that’s even more of an unalloyed joy.

For the past decade, give or take that memorable English summer of 2005, our colonial cousins from the Antipodes have ruled the roost.

Whether it was with a Duke ball, a Kookaburra, or just a plain old beach ball, those baggy green caps were seldom doffed in submission to our lads in white.

But Adelaide was an absolute turn-about on the other side of the world. It wasn’t just a win, it was an annihilation. The entire England XI played a full part leaving the host nation in a rare state of mourning for the game they have commandeered and commanded for so long.

And thankfully the England team have not let it go to their heads, certainly not astute skipper Andrew Strauss. He succinctly agreed with team manager Andy Flower that the Adelaide success was just one win in the Second Test following a drawn opener and with three more still to go.

Now that’s the attitude England needs – not one of premature exultation – but one of circumspect celebration.

They have the platform now and hopefully they will build on it for the next three Tests against an Australian team resembling a raggedy-tagged unit.

And as much as the defeat, it is the outcry from the hosts’ media and supporters that increases the delight back here in the English ice age. Jeez, it has even been reported that some Australian businessmen were ready to stump up one million Australian dollars to drag Shane Warne out of retirement.

Yes, this is the same Warne, who combines a promising career as a pundit with playing poker at various tournaments around the globe. Getting Warney back would be one heck of a gamble even by Aussie standards.

If the formbook continues to be over-turned and England win an Ashes series on down under turf deepening Oz dismay into utter despair, then there will be cause for celebration back home on the return in the new year.

But has a regal rod been made for England backs?

Five years ago when a Michael Vaughan-led England romped to Ashes conquest, the nation basked in the glow of the victory.

A reception at 10 Downing Street – Tony Blair never really missed a trick did he? – was followed by an open-top bus ride through the capital’s streets. Who can ever forget a certain Andrew ‘Freddie’ Flintoff looking like he had indulged in just a tad more liquid re-fuelling?

And another upshot was the awarding of MBE’s for all the players who had contributed to the series success.

So what if Strauss and company win the Ashes away from home? Now that an awards’ precedent has been set will there then be a new flurry of prizes? What is the collective name for a newly-created pack of knighthoods for investiture ceremonies next spring?

Admittedly, Sir Andrew Strauss, Sir James Anderson, Sir Matthew Prior, even Sir Graeme Swann, have a certain ring. But surely that will be going overboard? Or will it?

Events in Perth, Melbourne and Sydney will reveal all.

A REVELATION at last escaped from that famous footballing gentlemen’s club, otherwise known as FIFA, just why England lost the right to host the 2018 World Cup.

Jack Warner, he of broken voting promises, said it was England’s media “wot did” for the bid.

In the wake of investigations into corruption at FIFA by first the Sunday Times and then BBC’s Panorama programme, Warner maintained FIFA felt insulted.

Listen, Jack, all football fans are grossly insulted at the suggestion that corruption within the game’s governing authority should somehow be free of scrutiny when so many millions of pounds are at stake.

Shooting the messenger is merely a diversionary tactic. FIFA should get their own house in order, though that will hardly be the pressing plea from either media of Russia or 2022 venue Qatar, two of the most repressive in the world. Free ride eh, FIFA.

For their part England’s FA should investigate why an outlay of £15 million should yield just one vote for the bid, save for the other one from our own FIFA representative, Geoff Thompson. That cash could have been far better employed back home developing players so, wherever we play, we can actually go and win the bloody World Cup.