According to the commentator eagerly running up and down Wilberfoss Beck, dodging screaming children and low branches, this year's duck race with a staggering 150 ducks would be better than ever.

Having queued up to stake my claim on a plastic duck, the excitement was palpable as the race began.

I can imagine that this is how people feel when backing a horse at the Grand National, except this time it's not a horse, it's a plastic duck and it's Wilberfoss Duck Race not the Grand National.

The ducks began to pick up speed, my eyes were peeled for Duck 189, slightly confusing when there are only 150 ducks but, nevertheless, sure that my duck would appear and avoid the reeds and weeds to take the lead.

I continued to wait with bated breath.

Time passed. No duck. Race finished. No duck.

It soon became clear that my duck had somehow taken a dive.

This has destroyed my faith in what was meant to be a truly enjoyable day and, if you ask me, duck racing has definitely plumbed the depths in the world of sport.


Councillor fails to catch a mullet

SO the hustings in York are on their way and so across the city centre councillors - now called candidates - are streaming out in search of your vote.

Bedecked in their rosettes and confident of their party's policies, each knocks on your door full of confidence that he or she can secure your vote.

However, the Diary has learned that things do not always go to plan even for the most assured and persuasive local politicians. For one councillor received a timely reminder in humility when he knocked on the door of one of his potential constituents.

As the door opened he was confronted by a big burly character sporting what was best described as a "mullet". Looking at his voter sheet he peered up and politely enquired "Mr Smith?" (the surname has been changed to protect the innocent).

"No," came a rather gruff reply: "It's Mrs Smith and you can sling your hook, you've no chance of my vote now!"

Lamenting his experience of a pint of lemonade in a local hostelry, the councillor was overheard to say: "I don't know which of us were more shocked, but it is certainly a reminder that voters come in all shapes and sizes and that one should never judge a book by its cover."