THIS week I am treating a few lifetime friends to a ‘thank you’ lunch. I reached a significant birthday last month and celebrated quietly with family. I also wanted to thank some friends for helping to keep me on the rails, when at various points in life, I wobbled.

Mary was a teenage neighbourhood friend. My home was not a happy place, but Mary and her family offered me non-judgemental friendship.

I met Samantha at school in London. We were not good friends and had a hair pulling fight when we were 17. Then at twenty, I was working as a nanny, a mile away from where Samantha was a journalist. She bought me Petticoat magazine every week and I gave her lunch. A deep and lasting friendship grew. Her home became a sanctuary on occasions.

Katie and Cath trained as nannies with me in Windsor. Katie went abroad to live when I was a young mum of two and passed on some great clothes. Thirty years later, I had moved to York and Katie came to live in Selby. Cath’s home in Kent became a happy holiday home, when we couldn’t afford holidays.

Pat and her future husband were at a party I attended with their former schoolfriend, my first husband, on our first date. They have been supportive through some challenging times and when they were living abroad, provided some wonderful holiday destinations.

Helen and Val were in the same drama group. We were young mums with small children. We’ve all had tough times, but there has been lots of fun and laughter too, as well as tears.

I was also at school with Ailsa, but our paths barely crossed. Surprisingly, she appeared again 20 years later living in the same street in Buckinghamshire. Ailsa is of the most courageous women I know, the founder and CEO of the National Rheumatoid Arthritis Society. An inspiring role model. One evening in 1991, I was bemoaning my inability to cope with future events. Bluntly she said to me, “of course you will.” Short, sharp and to the point, but never forgotten. She was right.

While you can, get in touch with your friends and say thank you.

Rita Leaman is a psychotherapist and writes as Alison R Russell (chasingbows.org.uk/alisonrussell275.blogspot.co.uk)