THIS job ad in the Evening Press caught my eye:

Wanted: a self-motivated individual, prepared to work alone with flexible hours.

Qualities: perseverance, with excellent communication skills and the ability to remain calm and professional. Driving licence essential.

Surprisingly, considering the job on offer, it didn't insist on another type of licence - the one that costs "only" 33p a day and allows you (legally) to watch as much EastEnders and repeats of Only Fools And Horses as you like - well, at least until Changing Rooms comes on.

Yes, the TV licensing people need you. For an annual salary of £13-£14,000 you could join the ranks of what must rate as one of the grimiest jobs in the UK.

Let's consider the evidence. Detection officers have to identify which household hasn't bought a TV licence then lurk outside with a hand-held gizmo to detect whether "them indoors" have the telly on. A bit like the private dick trying to trap the adulterer of past, they have to catch the offenders at it, ie: watching the telly, hence the repeat visits.

About 1,000 non-payers are caught this way every day, and face fines of up to £1,000.

The job of TV licensing detection officer is up there with that equally objectionable position: the poll tax collector.

Both involve hassling people in their homes to hand over money to meet a tax which is inherently unfair. Let's admit it, the licence fee is another tax.

It is universal in that if you own a TV set (so, most of us then) you must have one. And it is unfair for many reasons, not least because even if you only watch ITV you still need to pay £120 a year to the Beeb so its viewers can catch the Strictly Come Dancing final. It's like insisting before you buy an Evening Press, you must also cough up for The Times.

It takes no account of your ability to pay, so many pensioners, people on benefits and low incomes have to fork out the full amount. The only concessions are to the over-75s, who get a free licence, and the registered blind, who get one half-price.

Ultimately, the TV licence is long-past its sell-by date. It was set up at a time when there was only the BBC. When commercial channels arrived, it was justified by the argument that the Beeb was a public service broadcaster, providing a vital function in British life.

And today? When we have three other terrestrial, commercial TV channels as well as paid-for satellite and digital alternatives, it is impossible to defend the BBC's insistence that each household give it a tenner a month, each week of the year, for the foreseeable future.

What's more, in trying to compete in the ever-changing world of broadcasting, the BBC has scored an own goal. It has used licence-payers' money to fund programmes for its digital channels (BBC 3 and BBC 4) which can only be accessed via Freeview, which you have to pay to set up. It means many of us are paying a tax for programmes we can't watch - or at least not until they get a second run on BBC1 or BBC2.

The BBC's Royal Charter is up for renewal in 2006, when bosses hope the Government will allow the licence fee to continue with above-inflation rises guaranteed through to 2016.

This week's announcement that the BBC is to make 3,000 job cuts and shave £320 million from its budget is part of a strategy to persuade Government that it is being responsible with our money and deserves more of it.

Recent reports revealed two-thirds of us no longer support the BBC being funded solely by the licence fee. Indeed, the Government and the BBC themselves believe the same but are at a loss to suggest a suitable alternative.

Well, here's an idea. Why not divert attention away from pursuing licence-fee dodgers and concentrate efforts on the much loftier and admirable aim of finding a way to fund the BBC which is both fair and just?

Which will leave TV licensing detection officers free to use their considerable skills of observation, perseverance and diplomacy for the greater good.

Updated: 11:33 Thursday, December 09, 2004