SO, the worst record of all time (November 11)? It's a question of where to start really.

Anything by a girl/boy band, Robbie Williams definitely, even Elvis had his off days thanks to his idiot manager.

The reason that we are today bombarded by such musically forgettable mediocrity is big record companies are once more firmly in control.

Looking back over our musical history, beginning with the blues, which suffered serious attempts at censorship both here and in the USA, it is noticeable that each time the record companies lost control, musicians began to push the envelope.

Starting with, in this country, the Beatles, Stones, Kinks et al led on to bands such as Family, Alex Harvey, Yes and Rory Gallagher and from the US Velvet Underground, Frank Zappa, Captain Beefheart and the Doors.

The second time this happened was with the punk era, which when the dust had settled, revealed some fine musical talent: the Stranglers, Jools Holland, Dr Feelgood and the like.

Although some bands and artists have managed to circumnavigate the system and become successful, we have never really seen this phenomenon since the mid-Seventies.

Cover versions are another happy hunting ground for the mediocre. Listen to the Pop Idol (his name escapes me) doing Unchained Melody, then listen to the Righteous Brothers - no contest. Listen to the Stereophonics doing Handbags And Gladrags, then listen to the Rod Stewart version: almost identical so why bother?

If you want to know how to cover a song, listen to Bob Dylan's All Along The Watchtower, then listen to the Jimi Hendrix cover. As for Mistletoe And Wine or God Save The Queen (the original), I won't even go there.

Charlie Stone,

Millfield Road, York.

PERHAPS canvassing for people's worst records you may open a huge can of worms. I spent Thursday lunchtime ignoring everyone while obsessing on this knotty problem.

I do agree with Peter Hope on Agadoo, by Black Lace and on Football's Coming Home, but I have to make two allowances in making my choice.

I don't think children's songs should be deemed bad just because they irritate adults, thus Clive Dunn is reprieved. I also feel generously inclined towards artists who have previously, or since, redeemed themselves with their contribution to music. The Beatles are an obvious case, and Stevie Wonder's I Just Called To Say I Love You escapes on the same grounds.

Even the fabulous Yellow Brick Road and Crocodile Rock can't save the obnoxious Elton though.

This will certainly not be my final list, but I promise not to keep e-mailing the letters editor to change it.

1 Agadoo by Black Lace (naturally!)

2 Football's Coming Home (representing all such football anthems)

3 I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston

4 Mistletoe And Wine by Cliff Richard

5 Blanket On The Ground by anybody!

I struggled to leave out that awful Robin Hood thing by Bryan Adams, only omitted because I can't remember its title.

Elton's Diana-tribute escapes because the original was passable, but I haven't even touched Country & Western or Eighties pop, and now I Will Survive has just come onto the radio.

This is so hard! Can't I do a top five records instead?

Andy Scaife,

Suffolk House,

Lowther Terrace, York.

RE the worst pop song ever controversy... Can I put in a bid for the toe-curlingly naff and phoney Lady In Red by the Emperor of Smug, Chris de Burgh? If you've ever heard comedian Bill Bailey on the subject, well, I couldn't agree with him more!

Ben Drake,

Danum Road,

Fulford, York.

Updated: 08:44 Saturday, November 13, 2004