KEVIN Smith is full of surprises, not all of them welcome.

The profane promise of slacker classic Clerks and the ambitious if flawed theological debate of Dogma made way for the gormless frat-boy self-indulgence of Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back.

Now he has gone traditional and mainstream with Jersey Girl, a mushy, slushy father-and-daughter dramatic comedy. Where once he was cynical and independent, the fresh voice and spirit of the subversive auteur has made way for the hopelessly sentimental.

Smith reunites with Ben Affleck - one of his vengeful fallen angels in Dogma - and in the intervening years since their 1999 movie, Affleck's commercial stock has risen, along with his celebrity but not, alas, his acting prowess.

Worse still, this is a 'Bennifer' movie, or at least it starts out that way. Jennifer Lopez dies in childbirth within the first 15 minutes - and the movie follows soon after in a diaper scene - leaving Ben Affleck on his own (a feeling he knows only too well in his on-off relationship with J-Lo, terminated since filming).

Affleck, in the guise of a self-satisfied, workaholic New York music publicist Ollie Trinke, is left holding the baby. Angry and grieving, he throws himself into his work, dumping daughter Gertie on his ageing dad, but when he slags off the absent Will Smith at a press launch, he loses his flash job.

Back home to blue-collar New Jersey he goes, to work for his dad's sanitation company and work at his relationship with mini J-Lo (Raquel Castro), promising to be the daddy of all daddies. Steve Martin or Robin Williams could do this schmaltz but not Affleck, whose palpable sense of embarrassment is surpassed by that of the audience.

Can anything come to the rescue of Affleck and his blank-plank acting? Step forward Liv Tyler, in spectacles and in a horny mood, playing a student-cum-video store-clerk with a frank line in intimate questions, determined to brighten up Affleck and movie alike.

Smith gets the devil inside him for Tyler's saucy dialogue and has some subversive fun when Gertie puts on her version of the gory adult musical Sweeney Todd, but Jersey Girl sinks in the mire of clich about adult responsibility. Even Will Smith's late cameo falls flat.

Updated: 14:39 Thursday, June 17, 2004