WHAT is the name for a native of York? We know those who hail from our subsidiary, New York, are called New Yorkers.

But on its own a yorker is nothing more than a delivery in cricket which pitches under the bat. And who wants to be known as underballs?

What about Yorkist? But that has a specific historical definition, meaning the follower of the House of York in the Wars of the Roses.

Well, then, why not Yorkie? It seems this is the most used general name these days. But do citizens of England's finest city really want to be associated with a teeth-snapping chocolate bar or a yappy dog? The question arises out of a long-distance telephone call from Scarborough. Margarita Thompson runs the Anglolang English language school in the town.

"One of the overseas students said, 'you are all called Scarborians; what are people from York called?'" Margarita said.

"We didn't know."

That is because there isn't a name for a York person, at least in the unrivalled experience of Hugh Murray. Hugh is the leading authority on York history and has books up to his ceiling. And he has never come across a noun for the indigenous city dweller in any of them.

So what should we do?

"You either turn to its Latin origins or you make something up around the word York," says Hugh.

If we opt for the former it means going back to when the city was founded by the Romans and called Eboracum. Hugh suggests Eboracensians, based on Eboracensis, the ancient civic seal. It's certainly catchy. Imagine shouting "Play up you Eboracensians!" as York City take on Forest Green next season.

But Hugh's memories of City go back to the days when the distinctive pattern on their shirts gave them their nickname, the Y-Fronts. Then they scrapped the kit. Dropped Y-fronts and underballs: not impressive at all. If anyone can supply a better name for York natives, please get in touch.

HAS anyone else nearly crocked their ankle on the newly re-laid cobbles leading down to Filey sea front? Too far apart, the gaps are filled with ugly black tar: what a shame the job wasn't done by the people who relaid Foss Bridge in York with such care last year.

NOW a late breaking story from the Grand National. A colleague has a friend with a very disturbed girlfriend. She is, he insists, mad, devious and manipulative.

Before the National, our co-worker e-mailed his friend to say he was backing a horse to win the Grand National as

a tribute to his girl. Sensing a thaw in relations, the friend told Lady Macbeth not her real name about this kind gesture.

But he hadn't taken in the horse's name. "It was something cuddly. To do with teddy bears, maybe," he said, handing her the racing page.

"Bear On Board?" she suggested, looking at the runner's list.

"No. It might have been to do with rabbits," he said.

She looked down the list again until she spotted the chosen nag. It was The Bunny Boiler.

Relations have iced over again.

TO end as we began, on names. What is so offensive about Hannah?

Yesterday reporter Matthew Woodcock sent an email back to a public relations woman which simply read: "Thanks Hannah".

A reply came back instantly: "The message you sent to Hannah Griffiths on 14/04/2004 13:57 was quarantined because it contained unacceptable language. Please consult your mail administrator in order to release the message."

Updated: 09:44 Thursday, April 15, 2004