BAR Talk is willing to participate in most non-contact pub games, as soon as we receive a written guarantee they will not quicken the pulse.

In that spirit, we have played doms (but not subs), darts, name that tune, guess the landlord's weight, spot the wig, it's your round, point percy at the porcelain, pointless argument, Biro face painting, onion ring hoopla and synchronised slumping.

But we had never heard of pub golf. Until, that is, old mate Shaun Singleton contacted the beer desk to tell us about one of the many innovations in his boozer, the Red Lion at Upper Poppleton, York.

It is now host to a golf society. But fear not, gentle drinker. This does not mean beer will be splashed across your shirt as a misdirected golf ball ricochets from the optics into your pint. Neither will a pair of silly trousers and plus-fours obscure your view as a competitor tees off from the snug bar.

The actual golfing takes place at the Forest of Galtres 18-hole course. The Red Lion is a sort of unofficial 19th hole, host to the golf society, ably captained by Arthur Bond.

Those of a Bar Talk disposition (ie slothful) need not fret. You can play darts and dominoes or, if your are feeling particularly potent, bar football.

Or you could join the mysterious York Birthday Club which operates out of the pub, which, we are told, is "one of the oldest single gentlemen's clubs in the UK".

All this proves that the Red Lion is roaring again after a few years resembling a moth-eaten moggie. Shaun and his wife Diane have been in charge for 18 months, following a stint steadying the Ship Inn, Acaster Malbis, and they have just splashed out two hundred grand on Poppleton's coaching inn.

It now boasts a 65-seater restaurant, named Wesley's because Methodist missionary John Wesley was said to have stayed at the pub in 1731.

Wesley's is served by a new kitchen, and even the air is freshened courtesy of a fancy extraction machine. The snug is non-smoking.

The refurb has also restored some of the pub's original features, including the red and black quarry tiles. Shaun says: "We've had people coming up and saying 'they don't look very new, these tiles', and we say, they're from 1720."

Ale connoisseurs can choose from Caledonian Deuchars and Bass on draught, and others will be happy with John Smith's or Tetley Smooth.

All this has impressed the locals - and people from around the world who stay in the 18-room accommodation.

The other Sunday, a party of Chinese visitors knocked on the window at 1am in search of beds and Shaun sorted them out.

For him, life at the Red Lion is a homecoming. He went to school in Poppleton and his parents ran the White Horse.

With daughter Laura, 16, working as a waitress, the Red Lion is a family business. And although Shaun and Diane have been troubleshooting in pubs down the years, they are ready, if you'll pardon the golf terminology, to stay put.

u ELSEWHERE in this fine organ, you will have been staggered by the tale of The Maltings selling a pint of Legless 11 for four of your English pounds.

This is Shaun "Kate Moss" Collinge's costliest brew yet, and as such should help him fund his family's increasingly lavish lifestyle.

But the reassuringly expensive ale is not the strongest he has sold. That weighed in at 13 per cent ABV, two per cent more than Legless 11.

For the more restrained drinker, next up at the Maltings is Russian Stoat, a Russian stout from Hobden's Brewery, Warminster, which is a mere nine per cent.

It comes with the comforting words: "No Russians or stoats have been harmed in the making of this product."

Incidentally, for those many men who are interested in emulating the catwalk finesse of York's own supermodel, we can reveal that Mr Collinge favours Company Menswear, Church Street, York.

u THE world's gone bananas. And that includes the Pitcher & Piano in York, which is now selling the first nationally-available banana beer.

Disappointingly, Frli Banana Beer (a piddling 4.1 per cent ABV) does not come in a curved bottle.

But Bar Talk's review sample did arrive in this handy see-through pillow. That means you can fall asleep on it and, in a post-nightmare emergency, grab yourself a beer without lifting your weary head.

The beer is said to have a taste like banana yoghurt. Not surprisingly, therefore, we haven't tried it yet. We're going to sleep on it.

Updated: 09:09 Saturday, May 31, 2003