There's a marked contrast in the state of homes belonging to working and stay-at-home mums. At least, there is in my neighbourhood.

On the whole, my friends who don't work live in squeaky-clean havens of calm, where organisation is the name of the game, where the plumped-up sofa cushions are neatly arranged on inviting-looking sofas, the magazines and newspapers are in orderly piles and the children's toys are stored away in cupboards only to be taken out when needed.

In these homes there is never more than a couple of mugs on the draining board, the ironing basket never contains more than three garments and the car keys are never lost.

Contrast this with my working friends. In their homes the sofa looks like a fly-tipper's paradise. It is the place where everything gets thrown - papers, schoolbags, toys.

You can't sit down for stuff. The table top tells a similar story of disorganised chaos, yesterday's pots are almost always present on the precariously overcrowded draining board, the laundry basket is usually full-to-bursting and the car keys are... that's a question asked every time my working friends need to go out.

Is it any wonder most young women want to return to the traditional family role of homemaker?

Yes, that was the point of that little rant: two-thirds of women aged between 20 and 34, interviewed as part of a survey, said they would like to give up work or work part-time and rely on their men to bring home the bacon rather than attempt to juggle motherhood and a career.

I'd say the same is true for us elderly mothers.

It is not easy combining work with the demands of raising children. It was hard when my daughters were tiny. I thought once they were both at school things would ease up.

But now there are events almost every week - school trips, parents' evenings, Comic Relief days, parties, you name it.

And my children like me to play a part.

Some weeks are so hectic that I forget to look inside my daughters' school bags and have been completely unaware of dressing-up days or - as in the case of last Friday - training days.

Thankfully, a friend mentioned that the school was closed, otherwise we would have been at the gates at 8.45am wondering where everyone was.

I work only part-time, yet I still can't run my life in an orderly fashion.

Yes, I'm all for a return to family life circa 1950.

There's only one thing that bothers me. Would it mean my having to wear a cute little Doris Day-style dress, kitten heels and an apron?

Would it mean having to keep my hair beautifully coiffured and my nails perfectly manicured?

And would it mean having to have the children fed, bathed and tucked up in bed and a piping hot, edible meal ready for my husband when he returned from work?

If that's what it means then maybe I'm not quite such good stay-at-home material.

Traditional ways are all well and good - providing you give them a 21st Century twist.

While they are growing up I'd love to be able to devote 100 per cent of my time to my children.

But I should also like to stick to the one per cent of my time I now devote to cooking, cleaning and catering for my husband's every need.

I think my dream is termed "having it all" and I somehow think I'm not going to get it.

Updated: 10:23 Monday, March 17, 2003