AT work women are forever trying to keep up with men - in status, earnings and now at the bar at lunchtime. Female workers are trying to keep up with their male colleagues, drink for drink, says new research. And the habit has spilled over into their private life, with women no longer having just a couple of drinks in the pub on a Saturday night, but trying to match the blokes, glass for glass.

Such behaviour has a serious side, bringing with it health problems, but it also had me wondering why, when women strive to keep up with men, it makes headlines? Yet when men try to emulate us, nothing is said.

This is because, if asked, a man will always deny that there is any area in which he strives to copy a woman - but there are many...

Like doing a dozen things at once. My husband has to wash up, dry up and put away every dirty pot before starting to cook the evening meal. It's not until he's eaten and washed up again that he feels able to make the children's pack-ups.

And then he'll take out the rubbish and feed the cat. If the phone rings while he's doing any of the above, he'll ignore it.

He can't do as I do - start the food and wash-up/dry-up/put away as it cooks, while making the pack-ups, de-frosting the freezer, sewing on name tags, tidying out drawers, taking out refuse, mopping the floor, answering the phone, feeding the cat. He tries, but can't.

My dad is the same. Men are multi-skilled - so long as no more than one skill is expected at any one time.

Then there's haggling. Whether it's a car boot sale, a Moroccan souk or a high street store, men are useless barterers.

They don't like confrontation and, if the last pair of jeans in their size has a small stain, they'd rather buy a block of Vanish than ask for money off.

After years of expert tuition from me - motto: 'May Every Purchase Be A Bargain' - my husband is getting better and occasionally comes home having got 50p of a tin of paint in the local DIY store by pointing out that it's discontinued. But he will never achieve the dizzy heights of haggling superstardom, and was in total awe of my Herculean efforts at the same store which netted a set of taps for £49 (actual price £130).

Chatting on the telephone comes next. However hard blokes try to chat to their mates in the same informal manner as women, they don't achieve it. They're incapable of anything but stilted formalities and you can't imagine them ever settling down on the sofa, legs curled up under them, glass of wine in hand for a long gossip.

Which brings me to the next female trait that men just cannot compete with, hard as they try - gossip. Men must be as keen as we are to find out the latest tittle-tattle (they're human, after all - aren't they?), but once they become party to such information, they seem to find it impossible to pass on. I know that's quite a redeeming feature - but it's also infuriating. They made an effort - and around two per cent make the grade. The others fail miserably.

They're also incapable of spending a whole afternoon having coffee in Starbucks. Men want to do it, but unless they're with a woman they feel conspicuous and compelled to move on. They're okay nursing a pint - but not a mug of coffee.

I don't think women can compete with men in the alcohol stakes - a long time ago I tried and failed miserably. The memory isn't a pleasant one.

There are things which women can and can't do, and vice versa - that's what defines the sexes. We shouldn't be competing, just settling for what we are.

Only don't tell my husband I said that if you spot him Christmas shopping in the bargain basement.