TONY McKINSTRY keeps an eye on the mysterious staff and the giant food portions in a York pub restaurant
We had more chance of seeing one of the Edinburgh Arms' two ghosts than the waiter. He served our main meals then disappeared to the end of the bar where the nun ghost reportedly stands around - never buying one, of course - before drifting into thin air.
I did not see him for so long I worried he had been taken hostage by a Yemeni warlord.
So what if I had to trek to the bar for a glass of cold water? My ghostly waiter was preferable to the obsequious, hovering variety which pop up like pantomime villains to ask if everything is all right just as you are about to start chewing.
I liked this one. I knew deep down he was there and sure enough he even materialised with a cold bottle of Australian dry white before returning to his perch by the bar.
Well, apart from me and The Veggie he was not exactly rushed off his feet with only three other diners to cater for. It was Tuesday 7.30pm so no need to book, but you better had if you want a meal from Friday or any time over the weekend, especially Sunday lunch when even the lounge is set up for diners.
For three days my guest had survived on a flu-gal diet of Panadol sandwiches washed down with Chateau Lemsip. Now, out of extensive care, she relished the chance of something more substantial. And it was substantial!
Portion control has about as much significance for chef Nicki Doughty and licensees Dot and Alison Waudby as molecular physics has to Panto Dame Berwick Kaler.
The portions were huge. The vegetables on The Veggie's plate alone must have cleared out three stalls in York's open market.
Being wise enough not to drop into the Edinburgh Arms - or anybody else's for that matter - without a little bit of homework, I had been warned about the large main meals by a friend who ought know, he's eaten there. The only time he sees his feet is when he's in the bath.
The restaurant part of the pub is eye-catchingly nondescript, wall lights, wallpaper and prints of steam trains. It has 20 covers and steak knives with wooden handles of the kind I last saw being wielded by Jim Bowie at the Alamo.
So for starters... we did not have any. But we could have had prawn cocktail, garlic mushrooms, garlic bread, soup etc. We'd been warned.
I chose the 12oz sirloin steak from one of eight meals on the Evening Sizzler menu. (There is also Pork Steak, 10oz Rump Steak, 16oz Rump Steak, Half Roast Chicken, Trout in Lemon Butter... you get the general flavour.) Or there were meals at £4.95 on the special blackboard like Homemade Rabbit Pie, Pork Steak in Cider, Savoury Mince Beef in Yorkshire Pudding.
The Veggie went for Spicy Beanburgers complete with a small market garden salad.
My steak came, sizzling on a skillet as promised, with onion rings, mushrooms and tomato.
So that this plateful did not feel lonely there were side dishes of chips, cabbage, peas, carrots plus a separate side salad! By this time we wished we had asked for a table for six to accommodate our order for two.
Sauces like Red Wine, Mushroom, Peppercorn and Garlic could be had at 90p each.
My steak was tender, thick and succulent by the time it quit sizzling. The vegetables were wholesome and numerous if nothing special.
The Veggie enjoyed her burgers (why do they always cajole carnivores to try their 'meat' dish?... indoctrination, I suspect). Her cornucopia of sliced, diced, julienned raw vegetables was a delightful alternative to Panadol tablets and the Jacob's Creek was infinitely superior to Lemsips.
Too full for dessert - Peach Icecream with real peaches, Chocolate Fudge Cake or Apple Pie (all at £1.95) - we paid up the very reasonable £18.90 and prepared to say goodnight.
On the way out we spotted the waiter. Good, he'd been released from the Yemen. The nun ghost had nipped out for the night so I asked about the other apparition. "Oh the ghost in one of our B&B rooms?" said Nicki.
"We know it's there. We haven't seen it but it is very tidy. It moves things about the bedroom if ever anything is left out of place."
Restaurant: Edinburgh Arms
Address: 25 Fishergate, York
Telephone: 01904 623085
Reviewed: January 23, 1999
Food: Wholesome, tasty and plentiful
Value: Excellent
Service: Infrequent but friendly
Ambience: Could be more intimate with thoughtful lighting
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