NEVER in the field of human eating, has such great food, been eaten so gratefully, by so few. I hope a lot of people read this review - because if they don't, the fantastic food in one York caf-bar will continue to go untried.

Alley Cats was deserted when my partner and I entered at 9pm one Wednesday evening. No exagger-ation - other than a waitress and a chef there was no one there but us, on any of the three floors.

Feeling ill at ease, we ascended the staircase of this ancient building in Coffee Yard and took our seats in the dining area.

My partner had a clear view of the historic Barley Hall, while I had the relaxed setting of a York snickleway at the end of my gaze - so far so good.

A bottle of Pays des Cote des Gascoignes arrived quickly and we set about it with vigour. Half a glass into the bottle, I began to quite enjoy the privacy we enjoyed, and we leisurely perused the comprehensive menu in tranquillity.

One trip upstairs later by our hostess and our starters were on their way: chips and cheese with relish, her choice, and for me the Alley Cats combo, a melange of potato wedges, steak strips, prawns and onion rings.

Dipping starters are traditionally small and simple, but this was huge and sumptuous. The largest slices of potato you could conceive disappeared quickly with the salsa dip, and the steak strips smothered in the barbecue didn't last much longer. Even my dining partner's chips and cheese were nice.

As our chef (who was the waiter as well) removed the plates, I began to wonder why nobody else was here.

I plumped for the sirloin steak, the only special, for my main course and although a tiny bit too well done, it was certainly a feast.

For a caf-bar, the food was surprisingly close to restaurant quality, and the portions too - though not the price.

Charlotte's tagliatelle with bacon in a tomato sauce was equally enormous and delicious. "Make sure you write something nice about this place," was her first thought after just one mouthful.

I asked to try it and it was as good a pasta as you could wish for: soft and tasty, flavoursome and filling, and, best of all, too much for her to finish on her own.

But back to my sirloin. The accompanying mushrooms and salad were the perfect complement to the huge slab of meat.

A side order of olives and garlic bread proved to be largely unnecessary, but, out of a sense of guilt - these people were after all cooking only for us - we persevered.

The wine continued to flow, but the pace slowed as two big-eaters became more and more satiated.

When we had finished, it took a good few minutes before I summoned up the strength to rise form my wooden bench and head for the toilets upstairs. And even they were worth a visit, with cat-themed indications of gender on the doors.

I apologise to readers who may have wished to know the quality of the desserts, but, remarkably, we were both too full to order any more. I didn't even have room for a coffee.

We settled our bill, a mere £32.90, and left rather happy that we had found such a gem in York's backstreets.

Now all we have to do is tell our friends, so that more people can take advantage of such great food, in a quaint and rather lovely little building.