WE strongly recommend that you cut out and keep tonight's despatch from the frontline of the hunt for Carlos.

Then, the next time you need to catch a wallaby, you will have an invaluable guide at your fingertips.

Apparently the way to entice a lost marsupial into your trap is to bait it with peanuts and Chardonnay - an Australian bottle, of course.

We hesitate to gainsay the experts, but might not a wandering wallaby prefer a beer? It is full of hops, after all.

Surely Carlos wouldn't give a XXXX for anything else.