There's a lot more you can do in 90 minutes, Kevin

I'M not a football-phobe, but I am a bad loser. As a Scot living in England, the next four weeks are going to be sheer hell. If another man (note, never a woman) reminds me of how Kev's lions ousted Craig's bravehearts from the European championships, I'll scream into my sporran.

I've nothing against England or the English: I've lived here for eight years and my other half is a Yorkshireman. But when it comes to football, nothing warms my heart more than seeing England getting a good drubbing.

As you can imagine, I'm not the most popular person to have around at times like these.

I remember being on holiday in Torquay during the last European championships when Scotland met England in the first round. We found a touristy pub, where I thought I'd be welcome. But I was mistaken. When I ordered some drinks, the bar woman said: "No sweaty socks in here today." I returned to my other half speechless and empty handed. He got the drinks in, but sent me to the sidelines for my own safety, where I watched the misery unfold.

So perhaps it's not so bad that Scotland didn't qualify. It's agonising enough watching the boys in blue play, never mind having to do it while surrounded by the auld enemy too.

I'm sure I won't be alone in dreading the next four weeks. Seeing as football is the nation's number one pre-occupation, I think there should be a trophy for anyone who can come up with a four-week calendar of fixtures which doesn't involve a round ball, a crate of lager and tuneless renditions of Three Lions.

In an effort to build up some immunity to football fever, I've gone in search of a range of activities which will guarantee you a footie-free zone - at least for ninety minutes at a time.

u Three cheers for Warner Village cinemas which is running a 'Chick Flicks' season throughout Euro 2000. Good old fashioned girlie movies - that's those that make you laugh and cry - will be shown for as long as the tournament lasts. One highlight will be Ben Elton's romantic comedy about a couple struggling with infertility, Maybe Baby, starring Joely Richardson and Hugh Laurie. And the even better news is that on Tuesdays, all tickets are half price, all day. For more details, call 01904 691199.

u Pubs will be the focus of much footie action over the next few weeks as fans gather to watch games on giant screens. But that doesn't mean you can't go out with your mates. Thanks to York's newly-arrived caf culture, you can wile away a good few matches drinking caffe lattes with your chums in a host of smart, new, city establishments. One to try is the Ha Ha Bar and Canteen on New Street, which is open until 11pm (10.30pm on Sundays) and serves food and booze too.

u Few of us need an excuse to go shopping, but with many of the Euro 2000 clashes taking place in the evening, the opportunity to shop 'til the game stops may be limited. Except if you are online, then all you need is a credit card (preferably your other half's) and some good shopping sites to visit. Try the following for some late-night retail therapy:

www.handbag.com, www.CharlotteStreet.com, www.ready2shop.com,

www.zoom.co.uk,

www.bestofbritish.com

www.marks-and-spencer.co.uk

You can also visit Shoppers World on the Evening Press' own site: www.thisisyork.co.uk

u Thanks go out to York department store Fenwick for organising an evening beauty event at the same time as England's clash with Romania on Tuesday, June 20. The fun kicks off at 7pm at the Coppergate store, where Este Lauder beauty expert Christine Cartwright will give make-up advice and answer your questions. Christine's party trick is to talk while removing and reapplying her make-up without a mirror. Tickets cost £5, redeemable against a purchase on the night, and can be bought from the Este Lauder counter or by calling 01904 643322.

u Creating a new you in 90 minutes may seem a tall order, but you could give it a go. Book the bathroom out for the duration of a match and stock your cabinet with lots of lovely smellies, such as bath balls and fresh face-packs from handmade cosmetic firm Lush in York's Coney Street. After a good soak, exfoliate then apply some fake tan (the Body Shop's Watermelon one is my favourite). For the really brave, slap on a hair dye, and while you're at it why not tint your eyelashes and eyebrows with a special kit from Boots?

u Anything Becks and Co can do, you can do equally well. Or at least you can tell yourself that as you puff and pant through a work out at the gym or an aerobics class in the community centre. If you've been promising to get in shape for a while but never quite get round to it, now is the perfect time to make a start. After all, the next Euro championships are four years away.