Working on a daily paper can be frantic at the best of times. One of the things that serves as a brief respite from the hurly-burly is the attempts some people will go to to advertise their product.

Most of the time, I'm glad to say, the press releases and phone calls I receive end up binned or forgotten. But at the beginning of the week I received a call from one Jessica Simpson, of Joe Public Relations, (I like that name) who now has the dubious honour of being the first PR bod to convince me to include her company in my column.

She was looking for publicity for www.panchang.com which, according to the her press released, is "a revolutionary combination of ancient wisdom and cutting-edge technology" which, in essence, is just astrology brought up to date.

Started in India around 4,000 BC, Panchang is based on the position of the moon in your birth chart, which reveals "your inner moods, character, feelings and emotions".

So what, I said, I don't buy into this guff (I'm paraphrasing here, clearly). A-ha, came the reply, why don't I email you a report based on your birthplace and birth date and you'll see how eerily accurate it is. Why not indeed - anything to get rid of this nuisance caller.

But then the Panchang report arrived and yes, it was eerily accurate. An eight-page document which described me perfectly (note tongue being placed firmly in cheek here).

It claimed I was charismatic and jovial: "you have a natural charisma about you, and usually draw people's attention when you enter a room." Normally because I'm tripping over my two-left feet.

But it continued, "your very quick mind, coupled with a ready grasp of the essence of matters, gives you a distinct advantage over others". This I could empathise with. I also have a "mysterious allure", which is probably down to not washing regularly.

One section was entitled Like A Chameleon, which I particularly liked. "You are forever prepared for new adventures in life." Yup, like sometimes sitting at the other end of the sofa of an evening.

"Your ability to adapt and change at a moment's notice is a real strength." I think my better half might take umbrage at this, finding me turning around in circles every evening in our new kitchen because I can't find the cheese grater.

"Your thoughtful nature keeps you young at heart," Panchang claimed. Wonderful, an excuse to not do the washing up when I stay up 'til 3 on the PlayStation. Why haven't you done the washing up, she will ask. Because of my sensitive nature that makes me protective of my feelings and cautious about expressing them to others, I will reply.

In You Swift Mind I found another perfect excuse, this time for nodding off in meetings: "sometimes, people may think you absent minded in discussions. Ironically, this is most often the product of your speedy, mercurial mind." Indeed, spot on.

The report continued with sections like A Skilful Speaker, Thirsty for Knowledge, Learned And Wise (with the immortal words "you have a good mind and fine intellect"), Romantic At Heart and the straight to the point Popular. We'll ignore the one entitled A Good Mother as an aberration.

The thing is, I'd love to deride what is quite clearly a blatant ploy to build and maintain a customer base through a rather sycophantic personality evaluation (you too can get a free report by logging on to www.panchang.com) but the fact of the matter is that some of the less obsequious passages actually rang surprisingly true.

Does this mean that everybody born in the same place as I on the same day have an "interest in spiritual or philosophical interests", or is this just a truism with which everybody can empathise. A more subtle attempt at flattery.

Who knows? What I do know is I normally only like moons in quadrants and alignments during the plot of some half-baked Sci-Fi movie which just happens to be on when I get back from the pub. But if you like that kind of thing, log on to www.panchang.com, which has the howard.com award for best sales pitch of the week.