One of the greatest things about the Internet is that it gives a platform to absolutely anybody with access to a computer. On the web everybody is equal.

It would also appear that on the web, everybody is weird.

Take, for example, Alex - a slightly self-obsessed TV executive from America (why are all wackos American?). Her site - www.spies.com/alex - has a web-cam in her office, and a proliferation of photos taken by her new infra-red camera. Pointless, but diverting nonetheless

Another of these vaguely narcissistic sites - and my favourite - is www.bowman.org. I strongly suggest you log on here just so that you can shake your head in mild disbelief at this totally materialistic (American) couple who have everything, and are quite happy to ram this fact down your throat. The self-awareness, yet total lack of irony always leaves me completely bemused.

I took a liking to Derek's site - lightning.prohosting.com/receipts - which holds every receipt he's got from his local Wal*Mart (America again). Sounds ridiculous, but it proves a fascinating insight into one person's life, and the visitor's comments are even more enlightening; 'all the same thing with the same item number yet different prices. I haven't been this excited since he bought the human skull.'

And then there's the life story of Mike the Headless Chicken www.miketheheadlesschicken.org, which features the immortal line 'he was a big fat chicken who didn't know he didn't have a head'.

Remember Tom Arnold, ex-husband of ascerbic comedienne Roseanne? Well he needs a bride. Any takers should log on to www.marrytom.com, although considering the rest of the content of this column, I think Tom must have a few screws loose to expect to meet anybody sane via the net.

Things get a little bit more disturbing on www.crazy-bitch.com, which details the story of Dave, whose girlfriend found out he was having an affair with his secretary and trashed his entire apartment. In amongst the photos of carnage wrought is a poll asking what his next move should be: a) Continue with the felony charges or b) sue for damages. Only in America.

But that's nothing compared to the craziness of one man who is convinced that letter-boxing (the little black lines at the top and bottom of the TV screen on wide-screen videos) is a form of censorship - members.aol.com/savetele/savetele.html. The sad thing is, you can't tell whether he's serious or not.

What makes you truly begin to wonder is when you come across wackos like Christine Toomey, whose web site www.englishrosepress.com opens with the stupefying line, 'Thanks to Christine Toomey, Diana's real contribution to humanity has just begun'. So begins the misguided ramblings of a mystic who converses with Princess Diana's ghost. No, really.

And if you think this is shocking then check out demonbuster www.demonbuster.com who even manages to claim that Easter is evil.

Then there's 'Me Human, You Alien: How to Talk to an Extraterrestrial' by Jonathan Vos Post adrr.com/lingua/alien.htm which is kind of self-explanatory, but is also completely engrossing. Opening line:

'This is your first meeting with an un-Earthly non-human entity: an Extraterrestrial (ET). If you handle it well, you will be the greatest hero alive, and be able to make a fortune selling your story to the media. If you blow it, the repercussions could be unimaginably terrible, perhaps an interstellar war that could annihilate humanity'.

But my all-time favourite wacko is our very-own David Icke (although he has now found a home for his 'views' in America, unsurprisingly). If you log onto www.davidicke.com you'll find out about shape shifting aliens that rule the world! The last time I saw Mr. Icke was on Wogan, and all he did then was extol the healing power of purple track suits (or was it turquoise?). How things have changed.

I'll leave you with David Icke's fervent warning, and what seems to me the perfect way of forestalling imminent disaster (and note Mr. Icke's view on sequels - clearly an enlightened individual):

'These "gods" could not take over the planet openly because there are not enough of them, so they are doing it covertly by appearing human. Movies like They Live, The Arrival (the first, not the sequel), and the US television series, V, tell the story of what is REALLY going on. I urge you to think about watching these movies to get up to speed if you are new to all of this.'