Having moved recently, I number myself among that group of experts known to each other as 'make-do-ers'.
When you first arrive at your new location, you set to, organising removal men (a complete and utter waste of time because they always ignore your plan); seeking out the one box you so carefully prepared so that coffee and kettle were available immediately (of course, you never find the box); and moving furniture into new places as you'd imagined it all (only to move it again ten times in the first week).
Then it happens, you become a 'make-do-er'. You drink herbal tea left by the previous owner because you still can't find the coffee jar. Your underwear suddenly lasts 'x' number of days (it wouldn't be polite to specify) because you can't find that bag either.
You can't plumb in the washer (never in my life would I even attempt it), and you eat take-away for the eighth night running while being peered at through the window because none of your old curtains fit the new place.
You see, you make do, as you also declare 'never again' because the move's been so awful. I guess it's pretty high up on the list of stress - though I have to say that dragging its heels not far behind is trying to light a fire with damp logs; running out of oil on a bank holiday weekend; and stepping on last night's dinner plate which you ate from the bed because it was the warmest place.
In fact, I'd rather present 24 hours solid of Look North while operating my own autocue with a foot pedal, talking from memory because I'd obviously fail miserably with that autocue, and hearing the news down my ear piece that Manchester United's won the league again. Wouldn't that be a stunner of a show for you all to watch?
Actually, it's funny how television habits have changed. Even the Beeb's interested in its viewing figures now. And all because of Sky - that's when it began to change, when those little round dishes started to appear.
How much of it is for the good, I wonder? Pay-for-view when you're already paying to view. Hundreds of channels with the onset of digital networks.
Imagine, you could have wall to wall football, or endless Emmerdale (it's on all the time anyway, isn't it?), or infinite repeats of the Terry Wogan Show - well, perhaps some things will never get an audience.
I have to admit, I'm excited about the prospect of choosing which football match I want to watch. You'll be able to, you know. If you want York City's game rather than Leeds United, you'll just punch it in at the touch of a button. Well, that's what the brochures say.
Only thing is, I'm not that good with technology. I've just got myself tuned into faxes when everyone else is into this e-mail business.
16/04/99
Converted for the new archive on 30 June 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.
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