WARNING: if you think chortling at rude words is contemptibly childish, please progress to our double Sudoku pronto.

If, however, you cannot stumble upon words like "bum" and "pump" without a titter, we have found the book for you.

Rude Britain lists the 100 rudest place names in our glorious islands, from Willey Lane to Feltwell, Ogles Close to Friars Entry.

Number one in the list is the Cornish hamlet of Cocks, which has resisted attempts by a prudish local authority to respell it Cox.

Naturally, the Diary was eager to discover what suggestive locations the writers, Rob Bailey and Ed Hurst, had uncovered in our corner of the nation.

In at number 92 is Booty Lane, found in the village of Great Heck, near Selby. Displaying notable historical knowledge, the authors suggest this "may indicate a history of boot-making in the vicinity" rather than any connection to the bootilicious J-Lo.

Wetwang had to be in there, and it reaches number 25. Former mayor Richard Whiteley would have been proud.

Our highest entry is the Hole Of Horcum on the North York Moors, which is ranked the 11th rudest spot in Britain.

Interestingly, Grope Lane in Shrewsbury is included. York's own Grape Lane is a refined version of something similar, although the original medieval name of that street is far too coarse to be printed in an organ of this gentility (and would even struggle to be broadcast on Channel 4 after midnight).

To be frank, we were a little disappointed by North Yorkshire's representation in Rude Britain (published by Boxtree at £10).

If the authors had scoured our county more carefully, they would found this to be a most fertile area for study. From Bell Bottom south of Slingsby, to Robshaw Hole east of Tadcaster; from Cock Hill, between Upper Poppleton and Kirk Hammerton, via Cockshaw Plantation near Sutton upon Derwent to Cock Beck below Tadcaster, we live in snigger central.

Don't forget The Rash near Askham Richard, Cromwell Plump close to Long Marston and Bitchagreen and Horn End, both near Blakey Ridge.

Or we could forget everything and head for Bohemia (turn left at Sutton-on-the-Forest).

THE Diary's references to the strange world of Sam Smith's Brewery took a bit of a pasting in a letter from Brian Carter published last Tuesday.

But the First Lady of Tadcaster, Ida Mary Goodrick, has rushed to our defence, describing Mr Carter as demonstrating "over-the-top righteous indignation".

"Some of us who actually knew both the father and grandfather of Mr Humphrey Smith, the owner of Sam Smith's Tadcaster Brewery, take issue with Mr Carter," she writes.

"I know that the late Mr Geoffrey Smith, Humphrey's father, would appreciate the free publicity. He had a great sense of humour."

Updated: 10:18 Monday, August 29, 2005