THE trio who launched the Keep York Local political have certainly got people talking. My colleague Julian considers the issue of putting natural born Yorkies first in his column up there.

The venture also provoked some readers' letters, including one from J Holdsworth last week, who said the trend for over-priced York housing began with the arrival of the university.

This prompted a further contribution. It comes from Eric Olthwaite, a pen name if ever we saw one. Nevertheless, "Eric" comes up with some entertaining thoughts on the issue...

"I have my own list of priorities to revive a Real York, which I send to Mr Hugh 'My Heart Is In Camden' Bayley, our so-called representative:

"Close the University of York and the law college, and use the land to build affordable housing. St John's College will be kept open, but all students and lecturers must have been born in Yorkshire.

"All doctors at York Hospital must be Yorkshire-born, or at least have been to Leeds Medical School.

"All teachers in York schools must have a proper Yorkshire accent. This will include St Peter's and Bootham, which have become hotbeds of southern insurgency in recent years.

"A local income tax of 20 per cent - exemption for those born in York; 40 per cent for those working as estate agents. For those not born in York, bins will only be emptied every four weeks.

"Stop residents of Malton and Scarborough coming in and using our dentists.

"Canadian geese to be evicted from Rowntree Park and replaced by proper Yorkshire geese."

Eric ends by saying he wants to start a campaign, and he welcomes donations. Just send them via the Diary; we'll do our best to see he gets them. (York money only, mind.)

THE new craze among York teenagers, sniffing petrol, made occasional contributor Chris Wood come over all nostalgic.

"I remember the golden days of being a youngster in York," he muses. "There were petrol stations everywhere - selling really low octane, poorly-refined petrol, oozing with lead, at a few shillings a gallon. What happy days they were - Regent, Dominion, National Benzole... we were never more than a few yards from a petrol pump, and we knew all the pump attendants too.

"'Eh up young 'uns!', they used to yell, as we staggered away having spent a few pennies on an afternoon's gerrycan's-worth, 'Don't forget yon stamps!'

"Now, of course, almost all the petrol stations are out at supermarkets on the ring road; some pumps are totally automated, they all only sell unleaded and petrol costs a fortune.

"And what youngster can afford a credit card? No wonder kids haven't got anything to do these days..."

FINALLY, a word from Woodthorpe's Phil Shepherdson, whose last appearance in the Evening Press came in an article offering 20 things to do to avoid Royal Ascot. He appeared under idea number 13 - "Be abducted by aliens" - because he was, in 1978.

"Since your Ascot article, I've had to lead a quiet life," he reveals. " My Astro club have shunned me, perfect strangers (and friends) have crossed over the street to avoid me and worse of all, I'm getting fan-like hysteria from Zeta Reticulans.

"They swamp my house at night with low pitched humming from their space ships and call in to visit. I wouldn't mind but all they drink is Earl Grey (they seem to be also Star Trek fans)." Somehow, this intergalactic communication business isn't as exciting as we'd imagined.

Updated: 08:51 Thursday, September 01, 2005