If Sky Sports 2 was showing a fight between one giant chicken and a hundred tiny horses, who would your money be on?
Or, if you strip the metaphor away to its bare bones... does size really matter?
Okay, so in a straight scrum between a Smart ForTwo and a Rolls Royce Phantom you know the Phantom's going to bulldoze the Smart car like a sumo wrestler chasing a toddler out of the ring.
But away from the scrum, the Smart car has the edge on manoeuvrability and three to four times better fuel economy.
The rugby union stat of choice for fans is the pack weight and it does remain a tactical cornerstone.
Do you go for a beast of a pack to exhaust the opposition forwards and gain and retain possession? Or do you go for a leaner and meaner version that might lose the odd scrum but will offer more in open play?
We're so obsessed with size that there's no point betting IF the phrase 'freakishly tall' will enter into discussion about Peter Crouch, but WHEN. The paradox being he's got better control with his legs than his head.
A generation of footballers have had their dreams shattered by being told they're too small. Michael Owen refused to accept it - and now scores as many with his head as with his feet for club and country.
And I hope Shaun Wright Phillips sent a photocopy of his £21million transfer paperwork to the coaches at Nottingham Forest who said he wouldn't have a chance.
Volleyball has switched on to the defensive talents of the more petite athletes with the creation of the libero, while 5ft 3in Mugsy Bogues became an NBA superstar, dunking the ball alongside the 'average' 6ft 6inchers.
Freddie Flintoff was lambasted for appearing to be overweight (he wasn't, it later emerged - it was a back support), and at the other end of the scale(s) you've got tennis stars like Daniela Hantuchova who had tongues wagging with her skeletal figure two years ago.
In a world where every day we are confronted with hundreds of images of the 'perfect' human there's no wonder that size in sport - and everywhere else - is a big issue.
The sooner word gets out that it's not all about what you've got but what you do with it that counts, the sooner the sports world will shape up, getting rid of unhealthy attitudes in the process.
Updated: 10:47 Saturday, December 03, 2005
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