"Squeerr-ul. There's ow-nly one squeerr-ul..."

The Highbury massive were in full voice on Wednesday. Never mind the whole getting one foot in the biggest European final thing - this was all about a tiny gatecrasher-cum-pitch invader, dressed in grey.

How on earth did he get past security without a ticket? The term 'gold dust' was being replaced by 'diesel' in the tickets-are-like context in the build-up to this game - the last ever European football match, the last ever midweek game even, for the truly sentimental (those poor floodlights... sniff) at Highbury.

Yet this mite just strolls past the yellow jackets like a streaker protesting at nudity with his full coat of fur.

Maybe he pulled a nifty little Jedi mind trick out of the bag. Or perhaps he was one of the cast members of the latest Charlie and the Chocolate Factory flick trading on celebrity status.

Can you imagine the phone call... Highbury ticket office: "No, you can't have a ticket. They're all sold out".

Squirrel (in a high-pitched squeak a la the chipmunks): "But I can tell you where to get London's finest nuts..."

Highbury (smiling, patronising): "Nuts don't win prizes I'm afraid."

Squirrel (a little menacing): "Ah but pets do. (Silence) Look, do you know who I am? I'll get Johnny on."

Highbury: "Johnny who?"

Squirrel: "Johnny Depp."

Highbury: "I'll see what I can do."

He showed a real flash of pace though, baffled the Arsenal defence and became a cult hero in seconds.

He even got an honourable mention in dispatches from boss Arsene Wenger.

In boldly going where no cute park vermin had gone before, he - and I apologise for assuming but, hey, it wasn't exactly obvious - also managed to get one over the Save The Red Squirrel campaign.

Only three and a half years ago, Rusty the Red Squirrel - a giant 6ft cuddly mutant of the rare variety - was unveiled as a one-off signing from the Wildlife Trust for their Premiership match against Bolton.

He paved the way for the little Terry (Nutkin - not John) by joining resident Highbury mascot Gunnersaurus at a publicity stunt to raise awareness of the cute red squirrels being gradually forced into extinction by the greys.

And then there was of course legendary defender Nigel Winterburn. Also known as psycho-squirrel to the Gooners, for reasons not entirely clear.

Maybe it was a covert marketing consultation by chairman Peter Hill-Wood to test the water for a new grey away shirt (fur optional). The cuddly toy, by the way, is a shoo-in.

One thing it wasn't though was a secret spying device... that would have been a mole.

Updated: 11:00 Saturday, April 22, 2006