YORK Knights star Danny Kirmond has opened up on the passing of his younger brother Jack, and has explained how rugby allowed him an escape from the situation.
Kirmond remains one of the more experienced heads around the Knights squad and has now been with the club for two years, first arriving when James Ford was Head Coach of York.
The 37-year-old explained how Ford offered him a route back into rugby after the passing of his brother, and how grateful he was to his family and wife, as well as how proud he was of Jack.
“Growing up me and my brother had your typical elder brother younger sibling relationship.” Kirmond told Tackle the Tough Stuff.
“My mum and dad used to make sure he came everywhere with me, he was always a bit smaller than everyone else so I had that protector role with him.
“At times it was quite annoying having to take this little lad around with me, but playing rugby and sport together, rugby on the computer and things like that, there’s a lot of fond memories growing up, in a really loving household as well.
“He left school and bounced around a couple of jobs, he was quite a character and probably had a little bit of trouble with authority!
“Even going through school with teachers and things like that, he fell out with a couple of bosses in a couple of jobs when he first left school.
“One day he just came home at 18 or 19 and told my mum that he was going to go into the army.
“I think everyone was sort of taken back by it really, and didn’t really think that he’d go through with it.”
“He joined the rifles and pretty much went straight of for his training camp.
“He went onto a couple of tours to Iraq and Afghanistan.
“It was very difficult when he was in the army, he was based in Padeborn for a lot of it and we wouldn’t really see him too much but we would hear from him.
“But obviously when he goes to Iraq and Afghanistan you always fear the worst really, a lot of them were really kids.
“You seem to think you have a good idea of what’s going on over there from the news and stuff like that, but when you hear it first hand, it’s a difficult time to sort of cope with.
“He suffered from PTSD to a point where he ended up in rehab for a couple of weeks, with a charity called Combat Stress.
“That seemed to really help him but his trauma was something that he struggled to talk about, me and my brother shared everything.
“He came to stay at my house for a bit, and one of the sad things was that when he passed he left a letter.
“Not for me directly, but just to talk about his trauma and I think it kind of summed him up really and the kind of guy he was.
“His trauma was that he tried to save a young girl that had been hit by an IED, that’s the trauma he had.
“To look back now at the relationship he had with my nieces and my little girl as well, it just goes to show even more how brave he was.
“I was very proud of him, I was very proud of everything he did, he was my little brother and I love him to bits.
“I’m really thankful that I grew up in a household where it was okay to tell each other you loved each other.
“I told him I loved him each time I saw him, I look back at texts all the time now, how proud you are, how proud I am of him for dealing with the things that he has dealt with.”
Kirmond went on to explain how Ford offered him a route back into rugby, and how the Knights supported him through a very difficult time.
“He said if you want to come back and train then you can train, and I said look, I’m not coming back just to train.
“I wanted to be able to play and to just get back to rugby.
“It’s something that I probably always use and it has helped me cope with different sort of issues.
“Even if you’re having a bad day, to be able to play rugby it’s a great release and it really did help me escape it, even if it’s just for an hour or an hour or two a day.
“I am extremely proud of all of my family, my mum and dad have been the strongest people that I know.
“They lost their son and I can’t imagine how that would feel to lose one of my children.
“My wife has been an absolute rock, she was there on the evening and was there with my brother when he got hit.
“For her to stay with him at that time, it’s such a brave act.”
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